as he sees himself

babyluv has taken a liking to cameras! not just having his photo taken (a lot) but he loves taking pictures! he has as awesome v-tech camera and a camera on his hand-me-down iPhone, plus guarded access to our iPhones and nicer cameras. initially he just liked to see the flash but now he's begun pointing at specific objects or people and taking real photos!

most fun, to me at least, is his growing collection of self portraits. he especially loves taking his own photos on my iPhone 4 using any of the photo apps. his favorites are IncrediBooth which has 4 different lens effects and takes a strip of photos like in a photobooth, and Instagram which let's you take photos and easily apply effects like aging or black & white.

so I'm encouraging his newfound hobby and putting together
a collection that he can admire. since the only thing he likes more than taking photos of himself is looking at photos of himself!

'as he sees himself' photoset

making me feel better

babyluv's had a little cough for a few days and because of the weather (the ice more than the snow, we live in a very hilly area and icy patches SUCK) we've been couped up in here together for days. so last night an itchy cough made itself known in my throat and this morning I woke up with no voice. eh, no problem, I can manage a cough and I can even manage the kid since he has a rapidly growing ASL (American Sign Language) vocabulary.

I told babyluv that my throat hurt and I couldn't talk so I was going to use a lot of signs today and we went over a handful of basics. he did great and seemed perfectly content but in my guilt ridden head I could hear his deep, little voice 'geez mama, I already don't feel good and now you spring a sign language pop quiz on me!! can I get a break!?!'

don't look at me like that, I know he's only 2 but he says a lot with his eyes. really!! and he's almost 3. oh whaddyouknow! *rolling my eyes and pouting*

well, just now he came over to me, handed me a fistful of the remains of his mostly devoured jelly sandwich, smiled up at me with his proud, jelly-smeared face and said 'here, that'll make you feel better!' then immediately erupted in body shaking coughs.

have I mentioned today how much I love this kid?

how to discipline a 2 year old

gee, you know i probably shouldn't have stated that as if i have a clue as to how to discipline my 2 year old. i totally don't. and my kid has tantrums.

big ones.

that photo was taken over one year and 20 or so pounds ago (20lbs lighter for me and heavier for him). that photo was taken when he was just strong enough to accidentally headbutt me during a tantrum and give me a black eye. yes, this happened.

fast forward to now. he's 2 1/2 and 40+lbs of super strong boy who insists on my constant undivided attention and the need to do whatever he wants when he wants. he's a toddler, this is what they do.

he's also annoyingly smart sometimes and believes that the ability to clearly state and repeat his case means he's gonna win the debate. for example this afternoon's naptime debate:

me: ok, after this show we're going upstairs. *a few minutes later the show ends* time to go upstairs!

babyluv: no, we go upstairs after the next show.

me: nope, i said when the show went off we were going upstairs.

babyluv: but i have to watch one more. *in his absolute moral imperative pleading voice*

me: no honey, upstairs now.

then i get his thoughtful face:

babyluv: hhmmmm, how about.... one more show and then i can go upstairs?

me: how about we go upstairs.

then he resorts to extreme polite cuteness.

babyluv: please, oh please, mama! pretty please with sugar on time!!! (how he says 'sugar on top' and it's way too cute to correct.)

of course i still have to say no and here's where things can get very dicey. if he's in a cooperative mood, or at least a fair one, he may grumble or whine but he'll do as he's asked with little drama.

but let the wrong mood hit him, and my darling's mood can go from sweet to sour in 0.6 seconds, and there's no telling what i'm in for. it could be he'll fun fall on the floor and thrash about. it could be his blood curdling 'NNNOOOOOOOOOO!!!' it could be he'll 'reach for the nearest object to hurl at the nearest wall and/or person.' or i could hit the trifecta and get all three.

when he and i are home alone together none of these really phases me anymore and they pass quickly. and by quickly i mean.....less than half an hour. but he's smart. he knows it's all about the timing.

he completely understands that jumping up and down on the bed and screaming because he doesn't want to go to sleep gets him ignored unless the other little boy that i keep days is also trying to go to sleep. then i can only ignore him for so long and if he decides to pull the 'pull his friend's arm.' bit or the 'throw toys and run from one room to the other.' number i have to pay some sort of attention to him or the other little boy never gets to sleep.

but what kind of attention do i give him?

truthfully, it depends on both of our levels of sanity at the time. sometimes just asking him if he's being a bad boy will make him straighten out. he doesn't like being considered a bad boy. i've actually even done the imaginary call to daddy:

'hello daddy, he's being a bad boy, you might not be able to take him to the playground.'

there have been numerous times i took the other little boy into our bedroom to lie down and left my angry son alone in his own room, but i'm not big on the 'cry it out' method so after maybe 3-4 minutes we return to a somewhat discouraged boy.

but there have been times when after an hour of bargains, threats of taking away things, telling him he's not being a good boy, even reverting to semi-swaddling by laying him down in his bed on his side, curling his arms up, putting him under a blanket and gently holding him in place while i rock him, nothing works. nothing.

sometimes nothing works and both of their naps are thrown off by an hour until he just gets his emotions out and i have to just accept that and roll with it. really, what else can i do?

at the end of the day, especially on days when i have to try every method above to get him to eat, sleep, share, play nice, walk up or down the steps, everything that he decides that day he simply can't do, i have to truly assess my mothering skills.

1. is he still alive. check.

2. did i manage to not slap the taste outta his mouth or otherwise put a hand on my child. check.

3. today did we give each other a generous amount of hugs and kisses and tell each other we love each other. check.

4. is he happy, healthy and as emotionally stable as a toddler can be. check.

5. am i proud of him. check.

6. did i make it thru today. check.

then all right. i've been a  good mom for another day.

babylove's love

this is a notice to everyone who will spend time with our baby boy alone, the people who love him and want to bond with him. he's a really good kid, honest! he doesn't mean to break your furniture and pull apart your electronic devices. he's just curious and very enthusiastic.

we want you to know that he probably likes you, he's very friendly, but he does have some unusual ways of showing affection, coupled with his....enthusiasm, it's easy to confuse his affection for minor acts of terrorism. this is a basic guide to understanding babylove's expressions of affection.



1. if he stares at you blankly for extended periods he probably likes you, or at least he's interested in learning what you're bringing to the table. captivate him with exagerated funny faces & sound effects and you've made a friend.

2. if he shrieks and runs away from you, he likes you. he just gets so excited in your presence he simply must flee. this is how he responds everytime he sees his father!

3. if he throws things at you he does like you. especially if he aims for your head. he's just sharing.

4. if he asks you to pick him up, then immediately put him down, then pick him up again, then repeat, he really likes you. he thinks you're worthy of being his plaything.

5. if he runs at you then pummels you about the head, neck, and chest with his strong little fists he thinks you're great! you're so great he can't believe you're real unless he pounds on you repeatedly!

6. if he's sitting on your lap and suddenly tries to agressively climb, you he loves you! he loves you so much he has to get closer to you, climb inside of you even.

7. on the rarest of occassions he will actually take your face in both of his little hands, says 'mmmmmaaahhh!' and plant one right on the kisser! this means.....well we're actually not sure. it happens so rarely we haven't had many instances to study this behavior. but we're hopeful!

so there you have it, a basic rundown of how babylove shows his love. so when you hand him back over to us just consider all of your bumps, bruises, and broken items to be signs of love!