mama i'm cooooooold!!! -- AGAIN!!

mama i'm cooooooold!!!

Once again our beautiful boy was selected to be in Parents.com Weekly Winners photo competition!! We were OVERWHELMED by your voting response last week which placed him at #31 out of more than 4,100 photos in the competion! This week we were even more astounded to see your votes bump him from #1396 to #96 OVERNIGHT!!! WHEW!

Today he's at #59 with four days left to vote, so please take a second (it only takes a second) to click on the photo and give him a vote (or four!) everyday and in every way. Vote from you laptop, your desktop, your phone and do it all over again from a friend's devices LOL!! Let's see if we can get our boy to NUMBER ONE and in the running for the $25,000 grand prize.

Thanks you profoundly for all your loving support, and babyluv thanks you too! :D

contradictions

a random thought just occurred to me about one of the most basic contradictions we teach our kids everyday.

we always tell them to ask questions, be curious, investigate and explore. but then as soon as they start asking the questions we feel uncomfortable asking we tell them 'curiosity killed the cat'.

i hate that phrase. it's more morbid and creepy than the whole 'rock-a-bye baby' business. i hate it more because most don't use the longer phrase (since it would contradict their desire to shut the questions up) that 'curiosity killed the cat but satisfaction brought it back.'

but i really hate it because it goes against everything that you say when attempting to raise a child that wants to learn. it's basically a fancier way of saying 'sit down and shut up' or more pointedly 'mind your business.'

i know there are going to be uncomfortable questions for me in the years to come and i'm really hoping i'll maintain the patience to not fall back on the cliche of offing inquisitive felines.

a message to the men

i just wanted to take a moment to honor the fact that i'm very proud of all the men in my life! i honestly am! i just took stock of all the men that are actually in my life; the men that are not just related, but family, not just associations, but friends. and if i call you either, i consider you a good man.

thank you!

please believe that you're all raising my son with his father and i and if he learns from you what true meaning of manhood is, i know that he'll be a good man.

again, and sincerely, i thank you.

detangling tips & techniques for natural hair (by Oyinhandmade)

detangling tips & techniques for natural hair (by Oyinhandmade)

__________

i've gotten a lot of hair questions recently, in person and via the interwebs. i've never tried to say i'm a real hair care expert but i think it's a testimony to the health of my hair and my son's hair that people ask me for hair advice. it's flattering and i'm touched and i want to give good advice.

so i'm gonna let the experts help me in advising you! the question i get asked the most is how do i detangle my hair and my son's hair. this video shows exactly what i do for both of us, using the fantastic Oyin Handmade Honey Hemp Conditioner! the only change is for my son i can usually put the conditioner in his hair right before bath time and just let it sit while he plays with submarine and rubber duckie.

i hope this helps!

Hard-Working Mom... or Hardly Working? | BlogHer

i just read an article on BlogHer that i wanted to share; Hard-Working Mom... or Hardly Working?

this is a very sweet article that i completely relate to. i'm a stay/work at home mom and i constantly feel that i'm not doing enough. i imagine that my fiance, friends, blog readers.....everyone who knows me, thinks i'm living some sorta easy life of lounging and playing and it makes me feel highly inadequate.

but then i look at my awesome big boy and i know that i'll gladly take the financial and social loss to watch him grow everyday and never miss a single 'first' experience. i see how happy he is and i know i'm doing the right thing for us.

are you a stay/work at home mom or a mom that works out of the house? what's your experience? do you have any regrets?

Hard-Working Mom... or Hardly Working? | BlogHer

relatively happy new year

taken about 12:05 am. new year's 2011, five minutes after babyluv realized the combination of staying up til midnight then having a room full of adults countdown to an ear-splitting scream and trumpet of noise-makers can wreak havoc on a two year old's fragile nerves.

Unruly!

For all those who don't know, I gave birth to that wild child that you rolled your eyes at because he was running away from his parents in the supermarket then falling out on the floor screaming NOOOOOOO right after grabbing some random breakable item off the shelf. Yea, that adorable li'l tyrant in all those photos. And yet he's still alive and just barely spanking free.

That doesn't mean I haven't sat and contemplated how I could make him wear one of those doggy shock collars without going to jail.

Don't judge me.

Thanks to Aja Dorsey Jackson of Black and Married With Kids for sharing your unruly child story!

Unruly! How To Tame a Wild Child by Aja Dorsey Jackson of Black and Married With Kids

BABIES!!

this is truly one of the sweetest, most wonderful documentaries I have ever seen! it's simply a candid look into the lives of four babies in four different parts of the world, from birth to age one.

in the words of daddyluv, it's like 'march of the penguins' but with babies. *single tear for the penguins*

if you're a Netflix subscriber it's available to watch instantly!

Melissa & Doug Dollhouse or Castle Giveaway

from the awesome folks at The Budget Mommy here's a great giveaway for you little ones!! a Melissa & Doug Dollhouse or Castle Giveaway! follow the link below for your chance to win.

Melissa & Doug Dollhouse or Castle Giveaway on The Budget Mommy!

Babies R Us & Toys R Us: FREE Tote & Additional 40% off Clearance Clothing

Toys R Us and Babies R Us has released a new coupon for a FREE tote and an additional 40% off all the clearance clothing you can fit in the tote. The coupon is valid through 1/23/10.

Take the coupon to the Guest Service counter for your FREE tote, and then start filling it up. Offer excludes clothing larger than 4T.

Many thanks to Thrifty and Thriving for the coupon!

working his magic

my kid's always working his magic!

how to discipline a 2 year old

gee, you know i probably shouldn't have stated that as if i have a clue as to how to discipline my 2 year old. i totally don't. and my kid has tantrums.

big ones.

that photo was taken over one year and 20 or so pounds ago (20lbs lighter for me and heavier for him). that photo was taken when he was just strong enough to accidentally headbutt me during a tantrum and give me a black eye. yes, this happened.

fast forward to now. he's 2 1/2 and 40+lbs of super strong boy who insists on my constant undivided attention and the need to do whatever he wants when he wants. he's a toddler, this is what they do.

he's also annoyingly smart sometimes and believes that the ability to clearly state and repeat his case means he's gonna win the debate. for example this afternoon's naptime debate:

me: ok, after this show we're going upstairs. *a few minutes later the show ends* time to go upstairs!

babyluv: no, we go upstairs after the next show.

me: nope, i said when the show went off we were going upstairs.

babyluv: but i have to watch one more. *in his absolute moral imperative pleading voice*

me: no honey, upstairs now.

then i get his thoughtful face:

babyluv: hhmmmm, how about.... one more show and then i can go upstairs?

me: how about we go upstairs.

then he resorts to extreme polite cuteness.

babyluv: please, oh please, mama! pretty please with sugar on time!!! (how he says 'sugar on top' and it's way too cute to correct.)

of course i still have to say no and here's where things can get very dicey. if he's in a cooperative mood, or at least a fair one, he may grumble or whine but he'll do as he's asked with little drama.

but let the wrong mood hit him, and my darling's mood can go from sweet to sour in 0.6 seconds, and there's no telling what i'm in for. it could be he'll fun fall on the floor and thrash about. it could be his blood curdling 'NNNOOOOOOOOOO!!!' it could be he'll 'reach for the nearest object to hurl at the nearest wall and/or person.' or i could hit the trifecta and get all three.

when he and i are home alone together none of these really phases me anymore and they pass quickly. and by quickly i mean.....less than half an hour. but he's smart. he knows it's all about the timing.

he completely understands that jumping up and down on the bed and screaming because he doesn't want to go to sleep gets him ignored unless the other little boy that i keep days is also trying to go to sleep. then i can only ignore him for so long and if he decides to pull the 'pull his friend's arm.' bit or the 'throw toys and run from one room to the other.' number i have to pay some sort of attention to him or the other little boy never gets to sleep.

but what kind of attention do i give him?

truthfully, it depends on both of our levels of sanity at the time. sometimes just asking him if he's being a bad boy will make him straighten out. he doesn't like being considered a bad boy. i've actually even done the imaginary call to daddy:

'hello daddy, he's being a bad boy, you might not be able to take him to the playground.'

there have been numerous times i took the other little boy into our bedroom to lie down and left my angry son alone in his own room, but i'm not big on the 'cry it out' method so after maybe 3-4 minutes we return to a somewhat discouraged boy.

but there have been times when after an hour of bargains, threats of taking away things, telling him he's not being a good boy, even reverting to semi-swaddling by laying him down in his bed on his side, curling his arms up, putting him under a blanket and gently holding him in place while i rock him, nothing works. nothing.

sometimes nothing works and both of their naps are thrown off by an hour until he just gets his emotions out and i have to just accept that and roll with it. really, what else can i do?

at the end of the day, especially on days when i have to try every method above to get him to eat, sleep, share, play nice, walk up or down the steps, everything that he decides that day he simply can't do, i have to truly assess my mothering skills.

1. is he still alive. check.

2. did i manage to not slap the taste outta his mouth or otherwise put a hand on my child. check.

3. today did we give each other a generous amount of hugs and kisses and tell each other we love each other. check.

4. is he happy, healthy and as emotionally stable as a toddler can be. check.

5. am i proud of him. check.

6. did i make it thru today. check.

then all right. i've been a  good mom for another day.

hairy situation

i spend way too much time talking about this natural, giant, curly mass of hair. i said 'too much time' because i'm not talking about my hair, i'm talking about my son's.

apparently my decision to just let it be big and beautiful as long as he lets me detangle and comb it a few times a week, doesn't sit well with everyone. there seems to be some unspoken rule that if a little black boy is going to have long hair it should be cornrowed or braided in some way. if not, cut it off.

i happen to think his hair is fantastic just the way it is and i have no desire to try and contain it. in fact, this one's for you kid!!

Whip My Hair Sesame Style - Willow Smith Remix (I Love My Hair)

he loves, we hate

my son will be 2 years old in a month. i know i'm in store for big fun potty training, grand scale temper tantrums, lots of new vocabulary, and budding personality traits, but have no mistake this boy is definitely his own person. he is a very verbal and articulate little man and has no problem telling me and anyone else what he wants, doesn't want, likes and dislikes.

and therein lies my dilemma as a mom.

when my li'l one decided to boycott eating all things red, i patiently complied. i knew it was a phase that would last as long as a 1 year old's attention span can last and of course it did pass (granted, he then decided to boycott eating the color orange, but my patience still prevails). my sweet boy is now adamantly protesting wearing any shirts with tags in the collar. i rather agree with this protest, itchy tags in baby clothes are just mean! but what happens when he absolutely LOVES something that i, or his father, hates?

at the moment, there's a particular cartoon that our boy absolutely loves, i mean he loves it. when he woke up this morning it was the first thing he asked for and at night it's the last thing he wants to see. i know it's just another one in what's bound to be an ongoing series of phases and i think it's rather funny. daddy however is not so amused. as much as our boy loves this cartoon, that's how much his father hates it. i mean he really hates it.


i don't let our son watch anything that i haven't watched first and nothing that doesn't benefit him in some way. anything he watches has to teach him something good, so it's not that this particular cartoon is harmful in anyway. his father just thinks it's a lame cartoon. that's the problem. the cartoon is not objectionable just unlikeable. so do we inflict our likes, our personal preferences on our son and not let him watch this cartoon or allow his personal preferences to bloom as they naturally will?

i've always loathed when parents say things like "my child will only eat chicken nuggets" or "my 5 year old loves the song 'birthday sex'" because as far as i'm concerned it means the child is the parent and the parent has allowed that child to run over them. a child has no job and can't buy themselves chicken nuggets or a cd so that parent has to provide these things. thus their statement should be "i only buy my child chicken nuggets" or "i let my child listen to 'birthday sex'". to me, these parents have a problem with accountability and a bigger problem with their parenting skills because in essence they're blaming their children for actions that it's the parents responsibility to control.

these parents also have the problem of wanting to be their child's 'friend' instead of the 'parent'. i thoroughly understand not wanting to deny your child something they really want, i know how tough it can be when a sad-faced, miserable kid begs and pleads for something i just don't want him to have or i know he shouldn't have. it goes from annoying to heartbreaking rapidly, but i'm his mother not his friend. my biggest role as his mother is to protect him and i can't do that if i'm too busy trying to be his friend. but in an effort to protect him the converse is also true.

as far as i'm concerned, just because i dislike something doesn't mean i have the right to keep it from him if it's something that does him no actual harm and especially if it's something that helps him. thinking back to my childhood and adolescence my parents were pretty good about living this concept. they created a learning environment in our home so that the things that were in my life as a child were all beneficial to my growing brain until i was able to earn my own money and indulge in my own preferences. i know they were not fans of the very loud heavy metal and even louder clothes and makeup, but their objections were few. their method was to expose me to as much as possible so that i had a wide berth of knowledge to learn from and develop. the end result is a 35 year old woman who can still rock hard with the best of 'em, or mellow out to some nina simone or sam cooke.

i will protect my son to the best of my ability everyday of his life. that means he will never have a chicken nugget that i don't cook myself or listen to any song with a title like 'birthday sex' until he's able to buy these things with his own hard earned cash, even if that doesn't happen until he's 18.

that also means i won't be forcing my likes or dislikes on him because then i'm not allowing him to be his own person, and frankly i'm very curious as to who that person is going to be and i can't wait to meet him!

babylove's love

this is a notice to everyone who will spend time with our baby boy alone, the people who love him and want to bond with him. he's a really good kid, honest! he doesn't mean to break your furniture and pull apart your electronic devices. he's just curious and very enthusiastic.

we want you to know that he probably likes you, he's very friendly, but he does have some unusual ways of showing affection, coupled with his....enthusiasm, it's easy to confuse his affection for minor acts of terrorism. this is a basic guide to understanding babylove's expressions of affection.



1. if he stares at you blankly for extended periods he probably likes you, or at least he's interested in learning what you're bringing to the table. captivate him with exagerated funny faces & sound effects and you've made a friend.

2. if he shrieks and runs away from you, he likes you. he just gets so excited in your presence he simply must flee. this is how he responds everytime he sees his father!

3. if he throws things at you he does like you. especially if he aims for your head. he's just sharing.

4. if he asks you to pick him up, then immediately put him down, then pick him up again, then repeat, he really likes you. he thinks you're worthy of being his plaything.

5. if he runs at you then pummels you about the head, neck, and chest with his strong little fists he thinks you're great! you're so great he can't believe you're real unless he pounds on you repeatedly!

6. if he's sitting on your lap and suddenly tries to agressively climb, you he loves you! he loves you so much he has to get closer to you, climb inside of you even.

7. on the rarest of occassions he will actually take your face in both of his little hands, says 'mmmmmaaahhh!' and plant one right on the kisser! this means.....well we're actually not sure. it happens so rarely we haven't had many instances to study this behavior. but we're hopeful!

so there you have it, a basic rundown of how babylove shows his love. so when you hand him back over to us just consider all of your bumps, bruises, and broken items to be signs of love!

I'm a Bad Motha-! - my kid's a jerk!

my kid's a jerk! yea, that's right, i said it; MY KID'S A JERK!

even more annoying is the fact that he's a very intentional jerk. i don't think he intentionally means to be a jerk, but he very intentionally does things that are extremely jerk-like.

po-tay-to, po-tah-to, whatever. he's a jerk.

i will say that his general jerkiness is making me into one of those crafty moms, so it has it's good side. for example, all babies love the drop-and-pickup game. it's a riot to them for whatever reason to take whatever object is in their hand and repeatedly drop/throw it then squeal heartbrokenly if you don't retrieve it for them.

of course when you do they just drop/throw it again. big fun.

[caption id="" align="alignleft" width="153" caption="our little lion at his true angry best"][/caption]my kid takes drop-and-pickup to another level. he'll squeal, screech, and flail about until he has a good sized collection of toys and trinkets within arms reach, then he'll hurl them one by one to the nether regions of the room, then squeal, screech, flail about or contort/struggle/writhe and attempt personal injury until he gets them back...individually. don't try to pick them all up at once and hand them to him in a bunch. not unless you want him to smack them onto the floor, or even more fun, throw them at YOU individually. and for a 1 yr. old his aim in uncanny.

after having to leave the room a few times and count to ten while taking deep cleansing breaths, i had to realize that he's only doing it because his way means he gets my attention for longer. even if i ignore the game for a little while, he'll bang his head on things, throw himself backwards, try to twist out of whatever he's strapped into almost to the point of giving himself rope burn; he'll force me to pay attention to him for as long as he deems necessary.

he's a jerk, but he's very intelligent. he's wiley. so am i.

i've now found ways to strap everything to him or to whatever contraption he's strapped into. it's particularly awesome when he's in his stroller and done playing with whatever bottle, cup, or toy that was occupying him and has to hurl it with all his might to show his completion; kind-hearted people damn near dive like their going for home base to catch the poor baby's object before it touches the nasty ground only to feel foolish when the object boings and lands back in his lap thanks to whatever cord or device i used.

somehow, he also senses when i'm trying to keep him on a schedule to that i can get some kind of work done. again, he knows that a scheduled day means less face-time for baby and this is not an option.

these are the days when the baby adrenaline kicks in.

he won't sleep. sleep is the enemy and the enemy must be defeated.

he will pull out every stop in his efforts to stave off the enemy. i've seen my child pull at his own hair, punch himself with toys (not the plush, squishy toys, the hard plastic ones), even bite his own toes so hard he left teeth marks just to stay awake.

and of course the more of this he does the more attention he requires because, you know, it hurts him. a lot.

so basically he won't sleep and he won't let me put him down for 5 mins. because he'll injure himself. or his new trick is to jam anything, including his own fist, so far down his throat that he pukes. then he does a happy dance in said puke and holds the offending, puke covered object out to me with a big, 6 toothed grin.

WHAT A JERK!!!

i mean if the person you lived with acted like this just for their own amusement you'd put their crap out on the street and change the locks! i'm probably not going to put my child out yet, but i don't care what you say, he really is a jerk.

a hug from the universe

i love when i can actually look around at the tangible and intangible things in my life and see, fully see, the energy i put out coming back to me. the hopes, the love, the dreams- all reflected in my day-to-day life. even better is when it's a surprise!

right now, my life is pretty damn good. i have so much love in me and around me that i sometimes don't know where to put it all. i am in love and it's the first emotionally mutual relationship i've ever had. it's the first time in my life i've been with someone who was just as in love with me as i am with him, at a time when we were both available to each other. the same man i took to my high school prom, and i loved him just as much then. we have a healthy, beautiful, energetic, happy, loving son and we all adore each other. 

but the expanse of positive wealth in my surroundings has layered over into other aspects that i'm just truly understanding.

i realized when i got pregnant that my social life was going to change. i would have to limit the time i spent with lots of my friends, only because they are good people and there are some things good people don't like to do around pregnant women. even if it's play loud music or have a cigarette, some people are just protective of the mother-to-be and my friends are those people. i didn't want them to be uncomfortable so i didn't hang out much. and the same applies to a woman wearing a 6 month old strapped to her front. there are some things good people just don't like to do around kids. i totally get it.

but i was missing a community. i was feeling a bit isolated and it was an unfamiliar feeling to me. i've always spent a lot of time alone, it was often the side effect of being a black nerd. but this time i was in unchartered waters and it was unpleasant. kinda like 'castaway'; i felt like i was reinventing fire....only in my womb.

but then, in what was a remarkably quick show of understanding, all of the members of my new community surfaced and gave me a little hug, even if we never saw each other. i got messages and emails from couples and mothers and soon-to-be mothers and lots more happy, nappy, natural people and it was all love and peace. it was sharing and laughing and offers of help and i was always touched and reassured. i was given a circle where i could laugh when i felt like crying, talk freely about disgustingly personal bodily functions and not have a single raised eyebrow, and just hang out and not feel like i was bringing the party down.

and i love my old friends, they are still my family and so close and dear to me and i see them whenever i can. i even take the baby sometimes (he's just too cute and people need to see him sometimes, he makes them happy!). and now i'm even more blessed with another family that i can call out to for advice, amusement, and nervous breakdown avoidance and they all have their own level of 'i've been there' experience. 

this is my big ol' hug to all of you! every one of my family and friends who knew to send me love when i needed it. who offered me help (even though i'm not very good at asking for help), who shared a story, who hung out with me at various levels of hormonal schizophrenia.

thank you, i love you, and i'm hugging you right now.

p.s. this big ol' bear hug goes out especially to kandi, tomeka, tori, the bennu tribe, mirlande and fam, stefanie, and meagan cuz you love our babies soooo much!

I'm a Bad Motha-! - Adjustments

It's amazing the things that one can adjust to in a short period of time.

I never thought I would not only get used to, but actually enjoy having a person drool or vomit on me. Having been a wild ass drunken club kid it's not the first time in my life that these things have happened, but it is the first time that I thought it was cute.  Granted, it's baby puke and drool, but it's puke and drool nonetheless.

I've adjusted to having liquid flowing from me without my control. It's an odd little dilema, when I'm home these days it seems pretty fruitless to wear a top because my giant, fat baby will either drool or puke on it, or attempt to eat through it to get to my boobs, however walking around topless has led to trails and puddles of breastmilk all over the apartment. Also, I've had female friends point out that if I don't wear a good bra more often my boobs will soon be in my lap (since I am a rather buxom broad).

I've adjusted to the post-partum narcolepsy. It's funny, I can't sleep when I want to because my child has radar and will always wake up as soon as I lay down intentionally (his radar is also excellent for knowing when I'm about to eat or have sex), but as soon as I try to sit and read a book or watch a movie.... 3 hours later I wake up wondering what the hell happened.

I can't even think of all the things that have changed over the past 4 months that are now just a regular part of my life and I guess being a mama means just taking it all in stride.... and only owning wash-and-wear clothing.

Welcoming Me Back

I think around the eigth month of pregnancy I started to really grasp the fact that I was actually having a baby.

Really, 'being pregnant' and 'having a baby' are two entirely different things. I focused on 'being pregnant', eating right, exercising the muscles in all the right places, getting doctors and making (and keeping) more appointments than I've ever had. Being pregnant was a lot but I was getting the hang of it.

And then it occurred to me one day that I wasn't just pregnant, I was having a baby!! I was going to be responsible for a tiny, delicate, fragile life that I have to raise and educate and prepare for the world! Are you kidding me!?!

I had more than one minor anxiety attack.

Luckily, it didn't take me as long to adjust to motherhood as it did to adjust to 'having a baby'. My baby is only 10 weeks old and I can honestly say 'I get it'.  Yes I am totally responsible for a tiny, delicate, fragile life that I have to raise and educate and prepare for the world, but it's so much more basic than that. My baby boy has the most beautiful, crooked, open-mouth giggle that I get rewarded with regularly. My baby boy recognizes me and will look for me when under stress; I bring him comfort. My baby boy will be a big boy, then a young man, and then a man, and I will give all that my soul has to make sure he's a damn good man.

My love for him initially made me frantic, self-conscious, neurotic and probably made me seem a bit nuts. I'm a first time mother, cut me some slack. Now, my love for him makes me cautious but joyous because I can see his love for me. His cute little baby love!

So, with all that said, I can feel the transition taking place. I can feel my certainty and confidence in the mother that I've always been and I'm feeling like 'me' again. I'm feeling my legs up under me again and I feel steady.

I wanted to pause for one second in the midst of my motherhood and welcome me back to the world.

Good to see you again!

Adding Up and Counting Down

Motherhood. Mommy. Mom. Soon, very, very soon, these words will apply to me. Damn. I'm not really sure that I'm ready, I wasn't even ready for the pregnancy and the abundance of changes that came about, but I guess most first time mothers have that sense of fear and uncertainty.

I have days where all I can think is, damn.

Initially is was difficult for me to say that I was pregnant. I wasn't wrapping my head around the concept very well. My 'partner', the baby's father, always tells people that I have a 'bun in the oven' or 'one on the way' or some other euphemism, which didn't help me to learn to vocalize what was going on. And then once I finally settled in the comfort of saying, "I'm pregnant." I had another obstacle to overcome.

I had to stop thinking of my pregnancy as some sort of ailment or situation that had to be dealt with and start embracing it as the best part of life and the one metamorphosis that my body would go through that meant more than any other. As uncomfortable and even downright painful as parts pregnancy can be, I wanted to make myself focus less on the discomfort and more on the actual little person that was forming and growing inside of me. This fueled my need to learn as much as possible about what we were going through. I wanted to know, week-by-week, what changes were taking place, what did my baby look like now, what should I be doing differently- any and everything I could pick up. It made the whole process more concrete to me, more real. Especially during that time before I could actually feel my little one kicking and squirming inside of me. Learning about my pregnancy helped me to accept it as natural and not quite as creepy as I once felt.

But that wasn't the end of it.

I'd accepted that I was pregnant. I understood the changes and developments that my tot and I were going through. It took a whole other mindset to translate 'being pregnant' into 'being a mother'.

It was one day in particular that drilled this point home. I was around seven months or so, it was early morning and I was trying to get a few more minutes of sleep. However the karate kicker in my belly had other ideas and simply wouldn't settle down. For about a week or so before this particular day, whenever my little one was restless like this first thing in the morning I would get up and try some prenatal yoga, or go for a short walk (which is my partner's cure for every pregnancy discomfort) but it hadn't been very effective. This morning I had an epiphany that should have been common sense but just wasn't to me; I had to eat something. I was trying to soothe a hungry baby and all I really needed to do was eat. I ate, and a short time later my well fed kicker went back to sleep.

Wow, it sunk in with a vengeance. I have a baby to take care of, regardless of whether or not I'm holding the child in my arms at present, I have a baby, not a pregnancy, to take care of.

So now, with less than three weeks until my due date, I think I get it. I have no idea if I'm going to be a good mommy, but I do realize that everything that is happening means that yes, I'm going to be a mommy. I know I'll be a good provider, everything that this baby has now in preparation for their grand entrance into the world, I've provided.

Plus I've done everything in my power to stay healthy and happy to get my little one healthy and happy before they ever see the light of day. Isn't that what a mommy is supposed to do?