Be Careful What You Wish For

This is a story about my ex-girlfriend and I, and how what she thought she wanted turned into what she got, and how unprepared both of us were for it.


I’m supposed to be in love with a woman named Lisa. I think I’m in love with her, but I could be falling out of love after a year of way too much drama and sex. Whatever the case may be, present situations find me living with Lisa and her twelve year old daughter, having moved in two months after we started dating. Very 'lesbianic' or 'lesbianesque,' if either of those were words.

Lisa has an odd soft butch appeal about her. Lisa's a short woman and she wears a short, natural afro that she brushes fanatically every morning until her natural curls lay just right. Her hair is always either one of two colors; jet black or platinum blonde. She wears the funkiest, most immaculate, butch outfits, name-brand tops and bottoms always at least three sizes too big for extra thug-ness, and sometimes a long string of pearls just for the hell of it. She is a barber, which I find too cute to begin with, and watching her stand at the chair and hold vibrating clippers in her delicate hands while stroking a man's head is immensely erotic to me. Men adore her and follow behind her panting and drooling just as much as women. I spend a lot of time at her barbershop.

But the strangest thing about my relationship with Lisa is that she isn't really out of the closet, at least not to herself. She spent years being mentally and physically abused by her daughter's father. He forced her to do drugs and other unspeakable acts, and he was the last man she was with. Thus when I met Lisa, even though she had not been with a man in over seven years, she was still telling herself that she was just 'experimenting.' At the time, I realized that there were serious problems and underlying issues there, but I had my own problems and underlying issues to deal with.

At the time, I also realize that her refusal to confront her sexuality is what leads to situations like the one I’m currently falling headlong into. However, I have to admit in advance that this particular situation I am allowing to play out for some thoroughly selfish reasons which will become apparent.


At this point in our relationship, Lisa and I are supposed to be doing this 'work on our friendship' bit, meaning we aren't "exclusive" and we are both allowed to date, even though we live together (don't roll your eyes at me!). She says, "I want you to feel comfortable dating another woman, as long as you don't forget that I am the number one." I guess I'm not the only one falling out of love, but denial comes in all shapes and sizes. I'm listening to her but I don’t want to respond. I want this but I don't want to seem like the one looking for some 'strange', if you get my drift. I'd never cheated on anyone, I honestly hadn’t, and my current need to do……something, was making me uncomfortable. But, hell, if Lisa was giving me permission….

It's Saturday night and my best friend Cassandra, her girlfriend Karen, and I are going to this gay club that we've frequented for way too long. I'm wearing my long, wavy brown hair out and bouncing on my shoulders, a tight v-neck brown tank top that made my 38D's proud, slinky black pants and black boots with a bitch heel. I want to make a friend and I want to dance.

An hour into the night and I've had two women buy me drinks, I'm dancing up a sweat and I don't see any of the women from my past that I might want to avoid (this tends to happen, especially at this particular club, but it's a fun spot, and one of a very few for gay, Black women in the city, so here we end up, often). All in all, I'm having a pretty good night already, even before locking eyes with her.

I've never seen her. She is tall, my height, about 5'11", thick, light skinned dread, with full, juicy lips and soft, smiling eyes. Smiling eyes that are staring right back at me.

Ten minutes ago I was dancing up a storm, for all I know I'm now doing the Texas Two-Step, because she's staring right back at me. She's talking to someone, smiling a warm and seductive smile, and laughing a huge and genuine laugh, and all the while she's staring right at me. How do I know, because my doofus ass is staring right back! Texas Two-Steppin' away. But I must quickly regroup and regain my sexy because she's no longer staring.

Now she's coming right over to me!

I'm on the dance floor, I have been staring at this gorgeous woman for I don't know how long across a crowded club and she has been staring right back at me and now she is coming directly over to me! I don't know what to do but keep dancing and in what seems like an hour and a second at the same time she's across the floor and right in front of me. She doesn't say anything, just smiles broadly and starts to bop in time with the music. I find the beat again and she slides in step with me and she's smooth; she knows just when to move, when to touch me, where to touch me, when to get hype with the music, and when to chill. That beautiful smile never leaves those full lips and her eyes rarely leave mine. This girl has heart.

We dance for a while, then we go to the bar for drinks.

That night, I just so happen to meet this sweet, intelligent, statuesque, sexy young lady named Tanya. Woo, the sparks, the sparks! When I say young, I'm around 24, and Tanya's 21 (maybe I should mention that Lisa is 32). Anyway, It’s getting late and I see my friends looking at me because I know they are drunk and anxious to get home and get all hot and bothered. Well, I've also had quite a few drinks and I'm feeling bolder than usual. I ask Tanya what she's doing when she leaves.

"Why don’t you come with us, girl? We got some more drinks and herb at our place!" My drunken best friend happily offers.

Tanya looks me dead in the eye and says, "Okay."

We all get up and go. Tanya tells the friends that she came with something on the way out the door.

We go back to Karen's apartment. Well, Karen and Cassandra quickly forget about us and go into the bedroom to 'handle their bidness', Ebonically speaking, and left Tanya and I alone to fend for ourselves. Tanya quickly shows herself to be much more aggressive than I. She asks me if I'm sober, I think about it and answer honestly that I'm not sure so she stands up, turns her back to me, pulls down her pants and shows me her (very nice, thong flossed) backside just out of the blue and says, "Does this help."

Well shit yea!

I don’t know whether my hands or my lips find her ass first, but they are both there. All of a sudden I want to smother myself there and I press my face deep. But then I think of a better place to press my face and I place my hands on her hips and spin her around. I run my lips along the soft cotton and she moans quietly, gently, stroking the top of my head.

Then she stops being gentle. She takes over.

She steps away from me, takes my hand and pulls me to my feet into her arms. She holds me close, looks into my eyes long, then levels me with a kiss that penetrates the back of my spine. Her hands are strong in my hair and on my back. Good god.

Then she sits me on the couch and with one swift movement pulls my top over my head. Tanya smiles as she drops to her knees between my legs, her lips finding mine like a magnet. The full curves of both of our bodies seem to melt together as we hold each other. She unhooks my bra and massages my breasts. I want to undress her, but she pushes my hands away. "No," is all she says.

She reaches down and unzips my boots and I kick them off. Then she unbuttons my pants and slides them down over my hips, smiling slyly and raising her eyebrow as she takes notice of my lack of undergarment in that area, but not mentioning it. Again I reach for her in an effort to remove some of her clothing, this time she’s more forceful as she places one hand on my chest, forcing me to lay down, and immediately pushing her entire face powerfully into my pussy, her tongue instantly striking upon my clit.

It takes my breath right out of my throat and I literally almost choke on a semi-spontaneous orgasm. But as fast as she starts, she stops!

She stands up, allowing her already unbuttoned pants to fall to the floor.

"Get up."

"What!"

She laughs. "C'mon, get up. Stand up." I stand. She lies down on the couch and sternly says, "Now sit on my face."

WHAT THE FUCK! Are you kidding me!?! She senses my moment of hesitation and says again, "Now sit on my face." Well all-righty then!

I grab hold of the back of the couch and position myself on top of those beautiful lips, one foot on the floor, one knee bent on the couch. She reaches one hand up to get a firm grip on my hip, and the other she uses to massage my breasts as she demonstrates the massive suction power of those lips. Her tongue switches between darting in and out of me, and flicking about my clit. At first I try to be cute and try to move like I’m trying to strike a pose, but this bitch gets hip to my tricks with the quickness and does some kind of suck/flick/nick thing that – well, let's just say it makes me forget to be cute.

Hell, soon I hope that I'm not either giving her whiplash or suffocating her as I know I'm not controlling my gyrations well.

I guess even then maybe she thinks I'm holding back a little too much as both of her hands grab my hips and she buries her face hungrily in my hot and flowing pussy, my clit is so swollen it's almost sore. I dig my nails into the couch as my other hand grabs a handful of her dreads. My foot is no longer on the floor but on the coffee table by the couch, and I throw my head back as I bite my lip, desperate not to scream and send my known voyeur best friend running. I need to enjoy this alone.

She focuses all of her oral attention on my overly swelled clit and my foot begins to tremble. She flicks her tongue back and forth, back and forth, my toes curl, my stomach clenches, my eyes and head roll back. The rocking in my hips now rivals some of my moves from the dance floor and I'm at my wits end. I'm not sure if I give her any warning before I exquisitely and very forcibly explode in an earth-quaking orgasm down her throat. I'm worried I'm going to drown her in fluid but the strength in her hands on my hips doesn't let up until every quiver leaves my writhing body.

Oh, but Tanya isn’t done with me yet. She lifts me from her face, smiling and licking her lips like the cat that ate the canary. She lies me down on the couch and I get to watch as she slowly steps out of her black thong, and unleashes her stunning breasts from their bra. Damn she's spectacular. She lies down on top of me, perfectly placing her supple curves so that everything meets in all the right places. I can feel how excited she is, the soft, hot wetness of her pussy is pressed against mine. My hands are eagerly searching the contours of her skin, dying to take her all in. Her kiss envelops me again, as her pelvis grinds against mine. I think her hands are everywhere on me at once and I wrap my leg around her waist to pull her into me more. She wraps her arm around my waist to pull me into her more. We both find that absolute ideal rhythm, each rock-hard engorged clit thrusts upon the other, and ooh it feels exactly like a woman should feel against your skin, and my nails dig into her back, and she pulls the shit out of my hair, as we moan/squeal/exhale cum the fuck all over each other on my best friend's girlfriend's couch.

With my best friend and her girlfriend watching.

Tanya and I are staring at each other, trying to catch our breath, when,

"Yea, baby!" and applause! They have apparently finished their business and crept out of the other room and Tanya and I were to –distracted, to notice. I said the bitch was a voyeur. Hell, I'd stand and bow, but -

Eventually we are given the privacy to redress (okay, we go at it once or twice more, then we redress) and Karen takes us home. After that night Tanya and I talk quite a bit on the phone, and realize we actually have a lot in common, and we are very attracted to each other. But, we are both involved with other women, so we know nothing too deep is going to happen. Oddly enough her girlfriend has given her the same 'permission' to go out and date that mine had, I even talked to her girlfriend about it. It was very twisted, but normal at the same time. Well, I make the dumb mistake of telling Lisa about Tanya and of course Lisa starts to get insecure, so I try not to bring Tanya up too often. Yeah, like that’s going to work.

It starts out to be a regular Friday night, Lisa and I are playing cards, and Lisa asks if I want to place a bet on a hand. Damn, I should have heard the warning sirens right then. Sure, I say, why not. She says, "Let’s play, I need to think about the wager. I want to make it good."

What the hell am I thinking? Maybe I’m just curious as to what she's up to, I know she's up to something. She's not this slick. Okay, I'm game. She wants to play, let's play.

We play seven hands of Speed and she wins best out of seven. She's real damn quick to come up with her prize.

"I get to watch you have sex with another woman."

"AAAWWW, HELL NO!" I can just see red flags, warning signs, flashing lights and all kinds of shit going off in my head. Aw, hell no!

"C'mon, I you can renege on you bet and I'm cool with it! It's going to be fun, we can get some food, and drinks and invite somebody over here!" The bitch is practically drooling! "You can even choose whoever you want it to be."

"-Oh, really…."

Stay tuned for "Be Careful What You Wish For – Part 2"