Bag Ladies

we had to spend the past two days trying to resolve a single issue with the Department of Social Services. we have to go to two more offices tomorrow. it's not my favorite government agency to deal with.

but spending time in congregations of people, mostly women and children, who all need help, real help of some sort makes me that much more blissful about my life and the love i have for it and it makes me wanna hug all those people.

all of these people are there to say to some person who's right behind a desk but emotionally miles away (often for their own emotional protection) 'please help me.' they have to take a number, sit on hard plastic chairs, anxious and hungry (no eating or drinking in many government offices) for hours and hours just for the chance to ask some equally cranky person for help. there is no happiness in this place, just guarded moments of laughter, often at the expense of someone else in the vicinity.

there is no happiness in this place.

the flower child in me actually thought 'i wonder; if everyone in here got one good long and loving hug every day, would this office still feel like misery is the ticket for admittance?'

it's a hard place to be physically and emotionally. for everyone in there i'd imagine.

as he sees himself

babyluv has taken a liking to cameras! not just having his photo taken (a lot) but he loves taking pictures! he has as awesome v-tech camera and a camera on his hand-me-down iPhone, plus guarded access to our iPhones and nicer cameras. initially he just liked to see the flash but now he's begun pointing at specific objects or people and taking real photos!

most fun, to me at least, is his growing collection of self portraits. he especially loves taking his own photos on my iPhone 4 using any of the photo apps. his favorites are IncrediBooth which has 4 different lens effects and takes a strip of photos like in a photobooth, and Instagram which let's you take photos and easily apply effects like aging or black & white.

so I'm encouraging his newfound hobby and putting together
a collection that he can admire. since the only thing he likes more than taking photos of himself is looking at photos of himself!

'as he sees himself' photoset

contradictions

a random thought just occurred to me about one of the most basic contradictions we teach our kids everyday.

we always tell them to ask questions, be curious, investigate and explore. but then as soon as they start asking the questions we feel uncomfortable asking we tell them 'curiosity killed the cat'.

i hate that phrase. it's more morbid and creepy than the whole 'rock-a-bye baby' business. i hate it more because most don't use the longer phrase (since it would contradict their desire to shut the questions up) that 'curiosity killed the cat but satisfaction brought it back.'

but i really hate it because it goes against everything that you say when attempting to raise a child that wants to learn. it's basically a fancier way of saying 'sit down and shut up' or more pointedly 'mind your business.'

i know there are going to be uncomfortable questions for me in the years to come and i'm really hoping i'll maintain the patience to not fall back on the cliche of offing inquisitive felines.

a message to the men

i just wanted to take a moment to honor the fact that i'm very proud of all the men in my life! i honestly am! i just took stock of all the men that are actually in my life; the men that are not just related, but family, not just associations, but friends. and if i call you either, i consider you a good man.

thank you!

please believe that you're all raising my son with his father and i and if he learns from you what true meaning of manhood is, i know that he'll be a good man.

again, and sincerely, i thank you.